Today's rant concerns the "two most dangerous words in the English language": Marge Simpson. I have always disliked her, but today, this dislike became a burning hatred.
The episode that brought about my current fury is one from season 6-The PTA Disbands. For those of you who are unaware, Springfield's teachers go on strike after becoming frustrated with Principal Skinner's various (implausible) cost-cutting measures. As a result, the parents of Springfield, particularly Homer and Marge Simpson, are desperate for their children to resume their schooling after witnessing disturbing behaviour-or just general laziness, if the children don't happen to have the last name Simpson.
Marge's thoughts are as follows: "Lisa's becoming very obsessive. This morning, I caught her trying to dissect her own raincoat...Bart's not doing very well, either. He needs boundaries and structure. There's something about flying a kite at night that's so unwholesome." Uh, Marge? I believe providing boundaries and structure for your child is your department, regardless of his teachers being on strike. It's not like he was a saint before this incident. Regardless of the various explanations for this behaviour (ADD, not enough hugs, being a genius-whatever), there's clearly something wrong at home if none of these causes provide a solution.
This is just the tip of the iceberg, however. My primary gripe with the Simpsons is that it's been on far too long, and has 'jumped the shark'. In trying to combat this, the writers have decided to exaggerate the characters' deficiencies to the point of absurdity, instead of, say, coming up with improved plots, or even cancelling the show altogether to protect its legacy. There's no point highlighting a television show as the longest-running of its kind in history if it no longer has any credibility, and, to be blunt, is just plain shit. (That's a rant for another time, though. Back on topic!)
When the show began, Marge Simpson was a reasonably normal person, as were all of the characters-excluding the yellow skin. As the show progressed, though, she became increasingly needy and out of touch. Classic examples include her believing that potatoes are "neat" and show-and-tell worthy, not understanding why her 10-year-old son doesn't want to spend time with her (particularly if it involves 'playing the basketball"), and various references to somebody called Jim Nabors. Oh, and thinking that A-students are the height of popularity. As far as needy, my main complaint is that she frequently expects her family to do things and sacrifice things for her, with her (from my viewpoint) not giving a whole lot in return, aside from nagging-induced headaches. The family went on a holiday to England for her; Homer, despite his many fuckups, is always proving his love for her, yet she still asks him to do things like dump kilos upon kilos of sugar into the water "for [her]". For God's sake, woman, the man was panhandling for weeks to buy you diamond earrings for your anniversary (which anniversary is unknown, as they've always been married for 10 years); I reckon it's about time you stop expecting him to change himself and give up everything for you.
*Gasps for breath*. End rant. Time to go find something else to be angry about. Possibly Ned Flanders.
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